I now hold, in my powdery little hands, a Physician's Desk Reference.

Yes, THE Physician's Desk Reference®.

Okay, so it's from 1989, but it only cost me $1.50. You can't beat that with a currete.

Also, several other books from UNO's book sale, including Robin Cook's Outbreak, Terminal and Mindbend. Plus The Hours and Hunt for Red October, and many more.

This *might* just take my mind off Gaia. Slightly. Since I'd prefer to keep my Gaia account separate from this one, email/IM me if you want my username. I have too many enemies here. >_>

I just created a Gaia Online account.

WTF have I done? I need sleep...

feeling: oh dear...

OMG TEH IRONY.

feeling: anna b. demented

Being the auburn-haired, green-eyed hottie that I am, this Saturday I was tossed an entire package of considerably large green beads. On the label:

EUROPES FINEST
GULFPORT, MS
MADE IN CHINA

o_O

I was also thrown a rather scary-looking gnome doll with his hands stiched together behind his back. People, I cannot make this shit up.

The Commonly Confused Words Test

Test statistics:
Compared to users who took the test and are and in your age group:
100% had lower Beginner scores.
100% had lower Intermediate scores.
100% had lower Advanced scores.
100% had lower Expert scores.

Their failing English? Thats unpossible! Do we get extra points if we catch the typo in the result? I can't deal with only being 66% expert. Though there were several ambiguous questions. I said "practiced" and "practised" were both acceptable, but maybe they don't think so. LJ thinks it's spelled wrong, too.

My microeconomics instructor discussed the test with us yesterday. You can really predict the general outcome of a test by the weighted pauses, sighs and looks of pity an instructor gives.

prof: "The average...was 67..."

class: *wince*

prof: "The lowest grade...*sigh*...was a 33."

class: *audible wince*

prof: "The highest grade, though, was a 94."


I suppose it was rather arrogant of me to react the way I did to that statement:

me (thinks): Shit, I got a 94!


Or at least, it would have been arrogant...


...if I hadn't been right.

^___________________________________________________^

feeling: accomplished

Argh. Stupid shopping cart will not let me order Foundation Formula.

The feathered ones will be pooping greenish-blue for now.

Trimmed Faraday's and Flanagan's toenails yesterday. Ohhh were they ever sore. And my mum was no help, flinching constantly.

"Mom, just HOLD HER FOOT"
"I can't--agh!"
"She can't reach you!" [I was lying]
*bird lunges*
*mum jerks hand away*
*repeat several times*

I ended up holding their toes while my mum clipped.

Flanagan, of course, squirmed away once I got her out of the cage.

*chaos*
*Flan lands on the floor by the stairs*
Flan: Ooh, twine! *chews*
*t-shirt rains down from above*
Flan: AAGH! *fly away!*
Repeat last two at least four times
Me: Bullseye!
Flan: Who turned out the lights?

Their beaks apparently do not need trimming, as no one broke the skin.

Even on that little piece between my thumb and forefinger.

Me: *grabs Faraday after long chase around the cage*
Faraday: *chomp hand* *chomp hand* *chomp hand* *chomp and LATCH*
Me: OH SWEET HONEY MUSTARD!
Faraday: CHECK, BITCH.

After that mess, I decided against attempting to clip Flores' nails. I'd have to sedate him.

Also:

They discontinued the locket I wanted to get.

Why does no one sell nice initial charms?

I do not trust a charm company that spells it "cadeseus." Were I a doctor, I would not be interested in a "cadeseus" charm. Or labels certain charms as "Native American Indian." WTF is a Native American Indian? Either you're native to America or India. At least they didn't call them "Native Indians." That's not Indian, retard, that's ZUNI.

feeling: awake

I want this:

Meg and Jared Blew Me

If anyone knows who Meg and Jared are, even after clicking on the link, I'll give you a cookie.

Dear Lady Less Than Two Metres Away From Me With Obvious Upper Respiratory Problem:

If you don't stop that goddamn hocking, snorking and hwarfing, I swear to fuck I'm going to put you, and with you, everyone else in earshot, out of your misery. I don't mind a little sniffle. I don't even mind people blowing their noses. But you are going to make me fucking puke. I don't want to think what you're doing with that phlegm you're VERY LOUDLY hocking up. I don't care if you have cystic fibrosis. I do not come to the computer lab to be subjected to this.

Dear Dr. Trudell:

I admit freely that you know more than I do, and possibly ever will, about organic chemistry. But sadly, it seems I am the expert of us two when it comes to our native language. IRREGARDLESS IS NOT A WORD. IT IS A DOUBLE NEGATIVE AND MIGHT I REPEAT NOT A WORD. PLEASE STOP USING ITKTHNXDIE.


Thanks to my shrink appointment, I just barely got to physics lab on time. Everyone had already started. My group was the first to finish. Why? Because in addition to the busywork of motion detectors and carts on inclined planes and the faulty data thereof, part of our assignment, due before we leave, is to explain such things. Questions about the outcome of velocity and acceleration graphs abound. And invariably, this exchange takes place at each one:

Lab partners: WTF?
Me: *tells them the answer*
Lab partners: Oh! *copies answer*

As the rest of the groups do not have me to explain basic mechanics to their members, they must struggle through these questions with the scant grey matter they have amongst them.

Not that I'm bragging. But where's *MY* smart kid when I have to explain why a solution of acetic acid and ammonia conducts electricity? Was this even supposed to happen? DADDYYYYYYYY!!!

Me: Daddyyyyyy why is this happening??
Daddy: Fuck if I know.
Me: GAH! You're no help!
Daddy: >:(

Oh, and:

Dear Senile Bitch Who Almost Hit Me:

You see that red and white triangle? That says YIELD. Can you say YIELD? I knew you couldn't.

feeling: fluoxetiney

I'd like to thank some people here, and not in a snarky way this time ;)

filthy_lily, lower_class, princesswitch, the_alchemist, ketsuban, kali_kali, marauderthesn, meifyouwant even though she's not on my flist and many other people I've left out and blame this on alcohol and lorazepam.

Don't know you IRL, might never, but thank you, thank you, thank you for simply being yourselves and thus making me feel like that much less of a freak.

For my letter to the editor, which I will get around to posting, I was invited to the New Orleans Right to Life meeting tonight as a top-of-the-agenda guest.

It's been a long time since I've felt so incredibly out of place. So different. So different in a bad way. But eventually I gathered up the huevos to stop clutching my purse to my chest and stop covering my face with the flyers. I didn't say anything, really, but I sat up straight with my silver double pentacle around my neck, dressed all in black with my cat-eye glasses. I said nothing when someone spoke favourably of Focus on the Family, and nothing when people spoke of screaming outside a clinic, but I pick my battles.

"Right over easy." It's easy to conform. It would have been easy for me to make the sign of the cross, bow my head and pray with everyone else. But I will not dishonour myself by hiding who I am.

feeling: exhausted

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I
pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a rude and frivolous volume
of inflammatory lore--
While I nodded, nearly slipping, sud-
denly there came a tipping,
As of something gently dripping--drip-
ing on my chamber floor.
"'Tis some raven," I muttered, "nip-
ping at my chamber door--
Only this and nothing more."

But then, I muttered, "'Tis a pity--
ravens don't live in this city.
And it's more akin to dripping, drip-
ping on a chamber floor."

Then into the chamber leaning, at what
I saw above me squealing, "Dear God--
Not my chamber ceiling!!"
The sodden carpet left me reeling
Cursing out my chamber door.
Quoth the Anna: "Son of a whore!"


Things to do: Fix ceiling before it rains again. GAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

feeling: irritated

Sunny/Dark: 8/10
drY/Gross: 5/10
Traditional/Offbeat: 6/10
Active/Passive: 7/10


You are a DGO--Dark Gross Offbeat. This makes you a Fanboy/Fangirl.

You like the strange, the random and the slightly upsetting. You'd like Monty Python better if they were all Terry Gilliam. If it's got references to stuff you thought only you knew about, like Fletch Lives, Nutella, or the Filmation Ghostbusters, you are prepared to pee.

Your humor is wasted on people who aren't paying attention. Just smile and nod and save your best stuff for that female friend who knows who Red Hot Riding Hood is.

You might like almost anything non-anime on Adult Swim, particularly Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Harvey Birdman and Sealab 2021. You might really really like the "Oh... my GOD" impression of Debbie DuPree I do when I've had a coupla Yuenglings.

Of the 10341 people who have taken this quiz, 4.1 % are this type.

Your Active humor score of 7/10 means you are ju-u-ust right. You're probably pretty popular -- a walking social lubricant. You know how to take someone from on edge to relaxed, and from relaxed to larfing. You're kind of like an episode of Arrested Development. That show is good. Anyway. Rave on, funny one.


HOW DID THEY KNOW!?!?!

Come to think of it, I'm feeling particularly dark, gross and offbeat. "*plays tiny violin*" shall now be one of my standards. Bwaha. *expects to be trolled*

feeling: teh evol

from ehrenrane:

TOP TEN REASONS TO DATE A PHARMACIST (my commentary in italics)

1) Pharmacists do it over the counter.
2) Pharmacists are Rx rated not just R, not just X, but Rx.
3) They find new routes of administration p.o., p.r., p.a.... o_O
4) You will want "no substitutions" Dispense as written.
5) They welcome all 3rd parties as long as we split the cost.
6) Hospital pharmacists do it on every floor. and sometimes in the beds.
7) They like easy-off tops Hee! I <3 this one.
8) Pharmacists give unlimited refills
9) They have a long duration of action
10) They do more than just "lick and stick" OH! Brilliance! But no senior discounts.

Ok, melatonin say anna go nite-nite.

You will swallow some tacks. You are a little
weird, maybe not so much in a good way. Buy a
yellow tie and wear it on your head.


What horrible Edward Gorey Death will you die?
brought to you by Quizilla

Luckily, I already have a yellow tie. With blue paisley! ^______^

I dated a man who was four months older than me when I was 24. he had a rather anorexic body, or maybe that of the typical computer geek, depending on the drugs, and he told me that if I went out w/ him, I could see what the nicer restaurants were like and how to meet men who had culture. (live in nola..tired of men who failed fourth grade...when they were 35)
he had traveled to montreal, owned a business, drove an SUV like a tiny-dicked hoser, had a decent apartment, he was perfect
of course many other females and males wanted to date him and he decided we should get married to upset a particularly slaggy one. and now he dead from cunt.

The original is here. A classic. Go read it. Surprising how close the stories are, really. And I doubt I need to explain who The Cunt is. No official word on the actual cause of his death yet (hell, there's a possibility he dead from coke!) or how she was might have been involved.

Anyway. Saw the guy from the Dervish in my physics class, met another HP otaku in chem lab, chem lab instructor looks way too much like FIL, semester seems easy enough.

In the Design Toscano catalogue, there's a vodka (or whatever) shotglass set with the blurb:

Perfect for entertaining, our festive 9-piece quality glass Celebratory Set is a fashionable way to say "nostrovia!"

I gaped for a minute or three. Oh, no. They DIDN'T.

If anyone, anywhere, is familiar with some random dialect in which "nostrovia" would be a toast, please tell me.

feeling: in pain

Loot List:

Collector's Editions of:
Dogma
The Fifth Element
ROTK

Orli Bloom calendar
Official Gryffindor tie (NOW I find one...)
KMFDM WWIII
Fight Club (the book)

My grandma still can't believe I don't eat fish. Good thing I don't like sauerkraut, because she forgot she put bacon in her sauerkraut pierogis. Writing this is not helping my nausea. And whatever the landpeople are cooking downstairs--smells like lutefisk, okra and tripe...ugh...

feeling: nauseated

I will never get over the weirdness of eating dinner with my entire nuclear family seated at the same table.

No incidents, though, which is nice. I occasionally get the feeling that my dad would prefer if my mom just disappeared--usually when she insists on talking his head off, but they're completely civil.

I don't recall my parents ever being so civil to each other. Maybe it didn't make the heart grow fonder, but divorce works wonders. I think my sister has been experiencing the same shock of being seated at the oh-so-1950s-Cleaveresque dinner table, with our parents. Both of them. Conversing like...a couple...o_O Or maybe more accurately, like platonic friends. None of the romantic kissy stuff, of course. I think I would have a heart attack. No, I think my frigging head would explode.

Well, point is, I made a lovely solstice dinner with my mum...er...sort of helping...

"Mom, have you taken one look at the recipe??"
"...No..."

I learned from the Polish ultraconservative, my paternal grandmother, and the Creole renegade of funk, my mum. Their styles tend to clash, with the biggest exception being that one elusive skill they share that I try so hard to develop, the ability to cook with no clocks or timers.
And furthermore, those knives my dad has don't lie when they say they're the sharpest ones I'll ever use. I'd been meaning to trim those nails anyway. Like trim them off. And the tip of my finger.
The funniest part, though, was sitting down to eat, and everyone turning to me, as if they were expecting to hear a blessing or something.

Me: *blank pause* "Dig in."

Anyway. I didn't get much sleep last night, probably because it's been drilled into my head that if I turn my back on a lit candle, it'll come to life and dance around the room, setting things on fire, rather than just doing what it's been doing, staying in one place and flickering a bit. I expected to find dark red wax all over my dad's precious ivory carpet. No. It hadn't even dripped onto the candle plate. Ah, paranoia.

So Merry Solstice everyone. I'll try to find the link to those atheist carols--I believe they're on infidels.org.

feeling: chipper